Work jokes
If WW3 starts, I do, in fact, belong in the kitchen.
Why don't cheetahs say goodbye?
Because they are not going to work.
Why can't emos work at a restaurant? Because they cut too much.
I got fired for not doing enough work.
Guess I didn’t put enough backbone into it.
Am I doing my work? Because typing this took lots of work.
Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"
What is the one kind of work orphans don’t know? Homework.
What do strippers and peanut butter have in common? They both spread for bread.
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
They're not jokes, they're notes now, get me?
I am in trouble.
What's the difference between a hooker and Jesus?
Their face when you nail them!
So a kid was crying... I asked him what was wrong.
I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE!
I used to work for a company called 69. My friend took over my position.
I was working for Space X. I was instructed to control a satellite's orbit rotation when suddenly the screen went black. I investigated and found out one of Penaldos penalty had hit and destroyed the satellite. Shame on you Penaldo for ruining my dream job!
A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.
Women be like, "Equal rights, equal pay," then decide that they don't want to do labor intensive jobs.
I kept asking these kids where their parents are, and they started crying. I walked away laughing, thinking I love my job at an orphanage.
This isn't an orphan joke, but I got a job at a library, but it only lasted 15 minutes. Turns out, books about women’s rights shouldn’t go in the Sci-Fi / Fantasy section.
Why are the towers working out? They have big thighs!
She said you can twerk, so I put her in a tractor and put her to work. She got mad at me and said, "There's no good men," but I gave her a kob and equal pay!