What’s the different between a cat and a comma? A cat has claws at the end of paws; A comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
WHAT DO YOU CALL A PARADE OF RABBITS HOPPING BACKWARDS?
a receding hare-line!!!!!
Why don't oysters share their pearls?
Because they're shellfish!
What did PETA say when a cheetah won 5 million dollars?
You can't beat a cheetah!
To master puns you got to relish them first that's how I musterd it who knows maybe you will ketchup to my level
You want some dead batteries? They're free of charge.
I got udder jokes too.
Did you hear about the 100 centimeter girl?
I’d really like to meter.
Do you want to hear a money joke? "Never mind, it makes no cents."
You're probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time.
A pun walked into a room and killed ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.
Guy 1: "Tell me a bad pun."
Guy 2: "Alright. What's the difference between a tuna fish, a piano, and a tube of glue?"
Guy 1: "Ok, that last one was random as heck. What is the difference?"
Guy 2: "You can tuna a piano, but you can't piano a tuna."
Guy 1: "Ok, where does the glue come in?"
Guy 2: "Ah, I knew you'd get stuck on that."
What do you call a lesbian dinosour? Lick-alot-a-pus
I have a lot of eggculaint egg puns, get the yolk... oh come on don’t be hard boiled
I am not that good at making ice jokes, but it will suffice.
Not all cat puns are pur~fect some just have there claws
What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?
Anarexic.
- I think you're EGGcellent.
+ Wow... You really CRACK ME UP with that joke. I think you're a EGGxtraordinary comedian.
- Really? Are you done yet?.
+ Are you kidding? I have a DOZEN of them.
I make science puns, but only periodically.
How does Jesus make tea?
Hebrews it.
