Spell IHOP, now say 'ness' at the end... 😂 ...I ate your penis!
My friend says to me: "What rhymes with orange?" I said: "No it doesn't."
What college can Stephen Hawking not attend?
"Stand" Ford University. :3
What did the two paintings say after a long battle?
Let's call this one a draw.
Son: "Dad, are we pyromaniacs?"
Dad: "Yes, we arson."
What's a similarity between a cliff hanger and nooses?
They both leave you hanging.
When a donkey digs a tunnel, it is called a burro.
I only believe in 12.5% of the bible. I'm an EIGTHeyist.
What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs?
A paintball.
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
I named my dog 5-Miles, so now I tell people, "I walk 5-Miles every day."
What do you call a creepy flower? A Pedel-File!
apparently imma category for jokes now. hmm... ok! #HOMIEZ4Life
P.S. Say "crack my finger", now say it backwords:)
Q: What's a German's favorite Undertale character?
A: Gaster.
I don't like these Undertale jokes. They just don't make any sense.
There was a race between Lettuce, a faucet, and Ketchup. The lettuce was a-head, the faucet was still running, and the ketchup was trying to ketchup.
Officer sees a man and he is seeing he is having trouble walking, so he asked him, "Sir, are you drunk?" The man responds, "No, sir, I'm not drunk." So the officer asks, "How high are you?" And the man responds, "No sir, it's 'Hi, how are you?'"
What do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed. HEHEHEHE
What do you call a gay threesome?
A Sloppy Joe.
What do you call frozen Ibuprofen?
A chill pill.
