Woman jokes
Little Johnny walked into his house. He heard a banging sound from up above and decided to investigate. He opened the door to his parents' room and saw his naked mom and the woman next door. He thought they were wrestling and decided to join in.
I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent. So I said, "Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?" One of them snarled at me, "It's Wales, Dumbo!" So I corrected myself, "My apologies, so are you two whales from Ireland?"
If there was a zombie apocalypse, girls would make a "forehead apocalypse" since it is so big.
What did the drunk woman say to the man after leaving the bar?
"Alcohol, you later!"
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.
What do women and dog turds have in common?
The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Why do more women than men oppose abortion? Because they prefer not to get raped.
A strong woman.
I like my wine like how I like my women: 10 years old and locked in a basement.
"Yeetus to the fetus."
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A kinder surprise.
I got in big trouble the other day, though it was pretty unfair. Babies kick pregnant women all the time, and yet I got arrested anyways.
what did the woman do after meeting up with a rapist?
sue the dating site for matching her with him.
As a son, I am so worried about the phone call message that my mom got from a member of The CDC. It was on speaker, so me and mom both hear. The message told my mom that she needs to personally isolate because two of the new symptoms is having big titties and a great personality.
Women be like, "Porn is how we get money," then get angry when boys treat women like shit because they seen it on porn.
How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they can't change anything.
How do you know if a woman that is poor who is between 18-24 years old is poor enough to do anything for money to help pay her bills? She would be working as a lesbian prostitute inside a lesbian hotel in San Francisco, CA.
Men: "I like dogs."
Women: "I like cats."
Chinese: "Food is food."
What is the difference between a woman and ice? The ice always comes back.
What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?
By the time you're done with the breasts and the thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.