Woman jokes
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
Why did God create women before men?
He didn’t want any advice on how to do it.
What did God say when he made the first woman?
"Where is your dick at?"
It was women driving the planes for 9/11.
What's black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
What’s the difference between a woman and a policeman? One of them have rights.
My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."
Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.
If you don’t get it, a Chinese woman ate a bat and she got the coronavirus (I think).
A woman having labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”
“Don’t worry,” said Doc to the worried husband.
“Those are just contractions.”
Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?
What do you call a gay woman? I don't know.
What’s the difference between a WNBA player and a rotten apple? The apple has a chance to make it into the basket.
What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.
I got a job at a library. I got fired after 15 minutes. They told me it was because I put women's rights in the fiction section.
A married woman asked her husband if he saw the future. The husband answered her, "I have no eye, dear."
Women should have the right to choose whether they want to do cooking or cleaning first.
What did the creep do when the woman said, “Make yourself at home?”
He hid in her attic.
What's cold, blue and makes women cry?
Cot death.
What do cannibals call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Surprise.