I call my girlfriend .05 because she's a bag I blow into when I've had a few drinks.
What's the first thing that a battered woman does when she gets out of the shelter? My last if she knows what's good for her.
Why did the failed abortion climb up the woman’s leg?
It was homesick.
What do you call a woman with magical abilities and an android? Wanda Maximoff and Vision!!!!! Or.... Scarlet Witch and Vision!!!!!!! This joke was added to celebrate and honour Marvel Studios new series: WandaVision!!!!!!
How do you know if a woman that is poor who is between 18 - 24 years old is poor enough to do anything for money to help pay her bills she would be working as a lesbian prostitute inside a lesbian hotel in San Francisco, CA
what does a husband of a woman do when he is horny.he goes on a buisness trip with 100 1 dollar bills
What's the difference between a rock and a woman?
The flat ones get skipped
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
My buddy and I both wanted to marry a woman who happened to be an amputee. Sadly my buddy won her heart But I got her leg
A woman comes from a restaurant and ate a lot of beans. When she gets home his husband puts a blindfold on hair and says not to take it off. The lady hears her husband leave the room and starts farting really loudly. When the husband comes back and takes of the blind fold the lady sees 12 people with pegs on there nose singing happy birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A pregnant woman enters the hospital with her concerned husband. As she goes into labor, a group of doctors asked him if he would like to try a device that transfers your spouse's pain to the father's nervous system. He agrees and the doctors turn to dial on the device to 10%. Strangely, the man felt little pain. They continued to adjust the dial until it stopped at 100%, yet the man felt nothing. Later on, the wife had delivered the baby the pair left the hospital with a healthy baby only to find the milkman laying on their stairs with a puddle of blood around his head, shaking uncontrollably.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
what do u call some that is mexican the has a bmw
a big mexican woman
one day i was working at the bank, doing my job then suddenly a woman asked me to check her balance, so i pushed her over, then i told her that her balance is un-balanced
What do you get when you cross breed a woman and a horse? A nnaaahhhga
One day a woman met with a man behind an abandoned shop. The man asked for some crack The woman turned around and said, 'here.' That's where the crack was. you guessed it.
The next day she wiped it clean ready for the next guest who 'wanted crack' ;)
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A German soldier was walking down the street in a hail storm and a woman got hit unconscious he ran over to see if she was ok. Other people came running over they asked what happened and the German soldier said hail hit her
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Was busy robbing a house as quietly as possible and saw a woman catching me in the act, decided to get her on the act and gave away my location from the noise
