"Dad, what is 69?" asks son.
Dad: "Well son, it is a position where a man and women pleasure each other orally."
Son: "So what shall I write? Odd or even?"
What is the difference between a flat tire bicycle and a woman?
Answer: You need to pump the tire on the bicycle before you ride it, while a woman you need to ride her and pump.
What's something similar between a clogged pipe and a pregnant woman?
You fix both with a coat hanger.
What do you call the woman that fucked sooooooo many hunks to have the condom break and a failure to be born? Ur Mum.
A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.
When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"
God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."
So, I was watching YouTube, and then my friend says, "Those videos never get old." I replied, "Just like a Make-A-Wish kid." After I said that, he shot me in the head and said, "And now neither do you." Now Iβm in Heaven, and God says to me, "Welcome to Paradise where it is summer days, clear skies," and I said, "Are there summer women?" Now here I am in Hell with my buddy Hitler. I believe heβs a hero after he killed Hitler.
What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman? Getting her husbandβs voice just right
A woman in labor suddenly shouted, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Didn't! Can't!"
"Don't worry," said the doc. "Those are just contractions."
The Twin Towers were like a woman stuck in the washer machine. They both got freed.
What's the difference between a guy and a woman? They fall from different heights.
Wilt Chamberlain may have spread his seed among many women, but Kobe spread his brain matter all over California.
I used to be a man in a womanβs body. And then I was born.
A strong woman