Why jokes
Why do we never make adult jokes in front of orphans?
Because the joke needs parental guidance.
Why isn't the Moon Emo anymore?
Turns out it was just a phase.
Why are orphans so happy on Christmas? Because they might get a family.
Why did God create yeast infections?
So women would know what it's like to live with an annoying cunt.
Why do pedophiles always lose a race?
Because they come in a little behind.
Why was the Human Torch arrested?
He had firearms.
Why was the T-rex so angry? You would be angry too if your arms were too short to masturbate.
Why was the obtuse angle hot?
It was more than 90 degrees.
The worst joke ever.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Why was 9 thankful to 6? Because 6 8 7 2.
Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why?
-You have to be alive to have autism.
A father is listening to his daughter say her prayers before bed. The daughter says, "God bless Mummy and God bless Daddy and God bless Grandma and good bye Grandad." The father says, "Good bye Grandad? Why is that?" The daughter says, "Just because I felt like it." The next day, Grandad drops dead.
The father can't believe the coincidence, but decided not to question it. That night, he listens to the daughter's prayers again. She says, "God bless Mummy and God bless Daddy and goodbye Grandma." The father is shocked again and asks his daughter why, but she says again, "Just because I felt like it." The next day, the Grandma drops dead and now the Father is getting worried but doesn't know what to do, so he tries to forget about it. That night, he listens to his daughter again and she says, "God bless Mummy and goodbye Daddy." The father is now terrified and goes to work the next day sweating, cancels all of his meetings, and hides in his office for the whole day. He doesn't go home and stays there until midnight. He's very surprised. 'I've cheated death!' he thinks to himself, then rushes home. His wife asks, "Where have you been?!" and the husband says, "Oh don't ask me any questions, today's been miserable." The wife replies, "Your days been miserable? Well, listen to my day! Firstly, the milk man drops dead on the porch..."
Why does Michael Jackson like Chef Boyardee? He likes the little balls.
Six was scared of seven because 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because he was caught between 9/11.
Why don’t Asians use phones?
Cuz they wing da wrong number!!!
Why can't the Chinese play baseball? They ate all the bats.
Why can't an orphan get offended?
What are they gonna do, tell their mom?
Why was Timmy the only happy person in his family?
Timmy is dead.
Why did the car key never fit in?
He was too door key.
So, two kids argued and insulted each other.
KID 1: "Your dad left because he didn't want you, so why don't you kill yourself?"
KID 2: "Well, your dad already killed himself because he didn't want you."
Why do French people like to eat snails so much?
They can't stand fast food.