Why jokes
I was at my bank today waiting in a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!"
Adam and Eve are wondering whether they are black or white. Eve says, "Why don't you go and ask God?"
So Adam goes into the Garden of Eden and shouts out to God, "Are we black or white?" A big booming voice bellows out, "You are what you are."
He immediately goes back to Eve and tells her that they are white. "How do you know?" asks Eve. "Because he said, 'You are what you are,'" Adam replied. "Why does that mean we are white?" asked Eve. "Because if we were black, He would have said, 'You is what you is.'"
Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.
Why are black men's eyes always red after sex?
From the mace.
Why should you keep English gay activists away from neo-nazis?
British cigarettes get smoked easily.
The only reason why Murrikkkunts think Canada isn't free is because incest is illegal in Canada, in which one can face a sentence as long as 14 years in prison if convicted.
Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?
Because he successfully finished a race!
Why did Amy Winehouse snort Splenda?
She thought it was Diet Coke.
Why are people in Japan so thin?
Because it didn't end well the last time a Fat Man was there.
Why are people from New York so bad at chess?
Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks).
Why do black people only have nightmares? Because the last one who had a dream was shot.
Why do people in Alabama always swipe left on Tinder?
Because they aren't family!
Why are Republicans supporting giving felons the right to vote?
Because their own personal jeebus is a felon!
Why is Donald Trump so desperate to break into the White House?
Most landlords cannot lease their properties to him due to the fact that he is a felon.
I can’t take my dog to the park anymore.
Why?
The ducks keep trying to eat him.
Why would they do that?
Because he’s pure-bread.
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
Why is it wrong to drive around in a van offering children candy?
Because you’ll have more success if you give out video games!
Why did God create yeast infections?
So women would know what it's like to live with an annoying cunt.
Why are Christmas trees banned in mental hospitals?
Because the ornaments wouldn't be the only things hanging.
Why did the Jew get an electric car?
Because he was afraid of the gas.