John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather.
Chloe says, "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic!"
John says, "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler!"
Whos Jokes
My son, who is into astronomy, asked me how stars die. I said, "Usually from an overdose."
I told a joke to a guy who had jumped off a bridge... He was in bits! 🤣🤦‍♂️
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
If the minions serve whoever is the biggest bad, then who did they serve 1930-1945?
If you’re ever bored, then go outside and punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell, their parents?
What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.
Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Di.
Di who?
See, easily forgotten.
Why did the orphan try to get hurt?
Because then they would get surrounded with people who care about him.
He looks around, no one is there.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.
The other day, I walked up to someone who looked lost and he had all scraggy clothes on. I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents, buddy."
What do you call a disabled person who gets high?
Baked potato.
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
Confucius say, female pilot who fly upside down have crack up.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why?
-You have to be alive to have autism.
A man hit a woman with his car, who is wrong?
The man, because you can’t drive into the kitchen.
What do you call a Portuguese who commits a crime in Las Vegas?
Consensual Rapper 7.
