Whos

Whos jokes

Did you hear about the guy who died by lethal injection and writhed on the stretcher for 20 minutes?

I guess it really IS all in the execution.

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    • A man wakes up and asks his wife, “Are you okay? You were cursing me all night in your sleep.” The wife replies, “Who says I was sleeping?”

    Hey, do you know who Dragon248 is? No, who is he? He's dragging these balls off your face.

    My sister's boyfriend was coming around for Christmas Day. He had the option of two birds to tuck into: Turkey or Goose.

    I said, "Are you not satisfied with my sister, who is literally handing herself on a plate to you?!"

    Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?

    He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.

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    • What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?

    One says, "God is my father." The other says, "Who's the father and who is my son?"

    I hope you're an organ donor so your organs can go to someone who deserves them.

    She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.

    I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.

    Did you hear about the bull who went on a shooting rampage?

    I guess he was a little deranged.

    Apparently there was a woman from Australia who had sex with 500 men in one day.

    That's like a real life "Your mom" joke.

    Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?

    A. A loaded potato.

    There was a boy who owned a dog, who was walking while wearing headphones.

    Upon entering a park, he saw a sign that read, "DOGS MUST HAVE LEAD". He continued into the park, and became immersed in the music.

    After leaving the park 20 minutes later and turning around for the first time in a while to remove the lead, the sight of his now-dead, freshly-poisoned dog reminded him of the importance of heteronyms.