Whos jokes

Who wants a spot of bukkake for bedtime?

Did you hear about the bull who went on a shooting rampage?

I guess he was a little deranged.

Knock knock.

Who is there?

WE WILL ASK THE QUESTIONS!

A vegan and a transgender jump off a cliff to see who will hit the bottom first.

Who wins?

Society.

Apparently there was a woman from Australia who had sex with 500 men in one day.

That's like a real life "Your mom" joke.

Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?

A. A loaded potato.

There was a boy who owned a dog, who was walking while wearing headphones.

Upon entering a park, he saw a sign that read, "DOGS MUST HAVE LEAD". He continued into the park, and became immersed in the music.

After leaving the park 20 minutes later and turning around for the first time in a while to remove the lead, the sight of his now-dead, freshly-poisoned dog reminded him of the importance of heteronyms.

What is another word for Arab man who is a Palestinian Muslim?

Palestinian masseur.

My cousin is a surgeon.

Last year he botched a surgery he was doing on a patient who happened to be gay. He's being sued for malpractice for turning a fruit into a vegetable.

My son's class is having a career day next week.

He was all embarrassed about having a mother who works at the AISH office.

We've agreed that I'll tell his class I'm a prostitute.

What does a crooked lawyer who is not on the ACLU payroll have in common with a crooked politician who has an office in Washington, DC?

They both sign their names using a blue pen 🖊 🖊.

What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?

A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.

So I was at a restaurant and I really hit it off with the waitress, so one thing led to another and I'm at her place and she was really nice at the IHOP but when I was there with her she was all like "ahhh! what are you doing!?!?!? how did you get in my house?!?!?" and then she punched me and I'm the one who ended up in prison.

What do you call a wizard who can't secure a girl? Fumbledore.

A man hit a woman with his car, who is wrong?

The man, because you can’t drive into the kitchen.

Hear about the guy who dipped his nuts in glitter?

Pretty nuts!

Let's try to get to either max likes or dislikes, your choice.

And duck jokes, who would win in a fight, a baby or a pacifist, presented by duck?

What do you call a Portuguese who commits a crime in Las Vegas?

Consensual Rapper 7.

There once was a man named Dave who dug up a prostitutes grave, she was as moldy as shit and missing a tit, but think of all the money he saved

Surveys show that 80% of women who wear yoga pants never do yoga.

And 100% of men don’t care.