When jokes
When baseball players want to get together, what will they do?
Touch base.
Do you know when an African doesn't feel hungry?
When he is dead.
You're so ugly that when One Direction saw you, they went the OTHER direction!
Yo mama so fat when she goes to the shoe store, she needs to take their advice and get XXXXL.
What do you say when you hear someone tripping over at night?
Goddammit, Jamal!
Memes
When people ask my age, this is what I do.
“🥱 I DON’T CARE.... ÆAHAHAHAHAHAÆAAÆ!”
Yo mama so fat that when Thanos snapped his fingers, she was still there.
Yo mama so fat, when she walked in front of the TV, I missed 3 episodes.
Yo mama so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a bowl!
Yo mama so fat, when I swerved to miss her, I ran out of gas.
What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say when you leave?
"Thanks for coming. Hope you come again soon."
When can an elephant use an umbrella and not get wet?
When it's not raining.
When is a door not a door?
What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? (Dam!)
Your mama is so fat that when she went to the scale, it said, "No elephants allowed!"
Yo mama so fat that when she went on the scale, it showed her phone number.
Yo mama so fat, when she touched the stairs, it said, "To be continued!"
When we take a family photo, you are the background.
I said, "Are you half left or half right?"
"Neither! In-between."
"What?! In between your mom's tits when you go to sleep with her at night?"
I like it when your mom keeps on top of things.
(Male fantasy)
Yeah, on top of me on the living room carpet, snogging my face off.