What do you call a swearing piece of shit?
Cus-turd.
Whats Jokes
What does NASA stand for? Need Another Seven Astronauts.
What does a skeleton say when it has a lot of stuff?
"I have a skele-TON of stuff to do."
Me and my mom order Chinese food. So when it came, my mom grabbed the egg roll and started to suck it down. Then I ask my mom what are you doing. Then my mom says, "I love you for 5 dollar."
My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.
A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"
What’s the difference between apples and orphans?
One of them has a family tree.
What do you call an autistic army special forces?
You know what orphans and I have in common? Our dads both left for the milk.
I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I?
Roses are red, violets are blue, You make me pee like I drink tea, you make me go buzz, like becoming a fuzz.
It sticks in, but it goes to the bin, after its use, it will be reused, no it is not what your thinking its -~-(clay)-~-
What did the racist Catholic priest say?
"Martin Luther? Not my king!"
What is long and black?
The line at Popeyes.
What do your BF and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both never get erect.
What do you call a pool full of black kids? Baths bomb.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
What's the difference between a (hypothetical) girl and cancer?
Her dad didn't beat cancer.
What's the only time women are doing real work? When they are giving blow jobs.
What moans about women but wouldn't exist without them? A triggered menimist.
What type of flour do you buy an orphan? Self-raising.
What first went through Sally’s head when the Nazis came?
A bullet.
