Whats jokes
Saint Nicholas is the patron saint of working girls. Call girls. Hookers. Prostitutes. And the association is a long one, going back to the very earliest legends which place St. Nick as a Greek bishop in Myra, Lycia in what is now the Turkish Mediterranean - three centuries after Christ.
Saint Nicholas is notable primarily for giving secretly to the poor, and supposedly the first to benefit were three young ladies whose poor father couldn't afford wedding or dowry to marry them off - destining them instead to a life of prostitution. St. Nick supposedly threw a bag of gold through the window to pay for the wedding but, by the third attempt, the poor father was watching to determine the identity of the anonymous benefactor. Santa outsmarted him by dropping the last bag of coins down the chimney.
So, whenever you see Santa, he always travels with his three favourite sex workers - who seemingly never grow old. On a quiet, still Christmas night you can even hear him call them.
Ho! Ho! Ho! And to all a good night.
What does Kobe and the Twin Towers have in common?
The pilots just couldn't stick the landing.
Wow, that was explosive!
Man, I'm on fire 🔥 today!
What did the blind man say to his dog after eating dinner?
"Just ate a tasty steak!"
What’s the coolest thing about having a 12 year old friend...
You get to meet Chris Hansen!
What did the rape victim give to her rapist?
Head.
What is green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill you?
A pool table.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
It's still called a "cow."
What's the worst part about microwaving vegetables?
Fitting the wheelchair in.
What do the names Alan and Jordan have in common?
An.
What is the difference between a tree 🌳 and a car 🚘?
A car can drive and a tree cannot drive.
What do you call the Christian version of Donald Trump? Holy shit!
Little Johnny was sitting in class, and he was behind a girl called Sally. The teacher asks the class, “Who created the Earth?” And Little Johnny pokes Sally in the back with his sharpened pencil, and she jumps and says, “MY GOD!” And the teacher says, “Yes, Sally, God did create the Earth.” Sally sits down.
Then, the teacher asks, “Where do you go after you live a good life?” and Little Johnny pokes Sally again, and she jumps up and says, “HEAVENS TO BETSY!” And the teacher says, “Yes Sally. You will go to heaven after you live a good life.” Sally sits down, knowing full well Little Johnny was poking her. Sally gave Little Johnny an angry glare, and she turns around.
And then, the teacher asks the class, “What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?” and Little Johnny pokes Sally HARDER this time in the back, and Sally jumps, turns around, and says, “If you stick that thing in me one more time, I swear I’m gonna lose it!” And the teacher faints.
Why can orphans give all you people posting all these stupid orphan jokes over and over again a good kick in the face?
Well, what are you gonna do, tell their parents?
P.S. Stop posting stupid orphan jokes over and over again.
What do you call it when Neil Armstrong started cuming in space?
The Milky Way.
What's the only type of abortion Republicans will never do anything to prevent?
A school shooting.
What do you get if you cross Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama? A blonde n1gger cunt.
What has 2 arms, 2 legs, 2 eyes, 2 breasts for milking, and a hole to fill with my 9 inches?
A sexy female.
What’s the difference between Juice WRLD and George Floyd?
Nothing, they both can’t breathe.
What's harder than titanium? Michael Jackson at the playground.