Whats jokes
A local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing bet of one thousand dollars that their bartender could squeeze a lemon dry until all the juice ran into a glass, and anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried but failed. Over time, weight lifters, lumberjacks, men in the Army, and etc. But still, nobody could do it.
One day, a scrawny little man came in wearing thick glasses and a cheap suit and said in a tiny squeaky voice, "I'd like to try the bet." After the laughter had died down, the bartender said, "okay," and he grabbed a lemon and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rhine to the little man. But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass. As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the one thousand dollars and asked the little man, "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight lifter, or what?" The man simply replied, "I work for the IRS."
What did the roti say to pratha?
You white like a white bastard.
What do you call a wife who knows where her husband is at all times?
A widow.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is 10 babies in a trash can. Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trashcans.
What's the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits until a boy is 13 before it comes onto his face.
what up
If it is called a forehead, what happened to the five-head, six-head, and seven-head?
What’s 2 Mexicans playing basketball called?
"Juan on Juan."
What does a robot do after a one night stand?
He nuts 'n bolts!
What do you get when you stuff some cows into a food container?
A can o' bull.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anyone can roast beef.
What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?
What did Jim say to Jeff?
"I killed your ham."
What's the difference between a prostitute and a trash bag?
There's a limit to how much trash goes in the trash bag.
What’s the relationship between a pedophile and a light bulb? They're both meant for dark rooms.
What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? One alive at the bottom.
Q: What do you call a sad soda?
A: Soda-pressing.
What does an emo kid and an apple have in common?
They both are hanging.
What did the kid say to the toilet?
"Did you order a number two because I got one ready for you?"
What is the oldest animal in the world?
A zebra—it is black and white.
Hey, What do you want? We broke up like 5 days ago, leave me alone. Ok, first wanna do some things? What kind of things? Illegal things. Like what? Knock you off and hide your body. 🤡🤡🗡