Whats jokes
What's common between the penis and a Rubik's cube?
Both get hard when we play with them.
What did the science textbook say to the math textbook?
You've got a lot of problems!
What is a cow's favorite dance move?
The milkshake.
When the chair was invented, the inventor's friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: "You might want to sit down for this."
Son: Mom, can I borrow $50?
Mom: What? NO WAY! Do you think money grows on trees?
Son: Mom, what is money made of?
Mom: Paper.
Son: Where does paper come from?
Mom: . . .
They knew what they were doing
If Carlos and Jose took a brownie from me and I had 10 to start, what do I have?
Answer: A math problem.
With what do you stuff a dead parrot? His.
What did the ankle say to the doorman?
You are a nonsense.
Why do I call my dog a vibrator?
Because every time my dog acts like a dildo, I beat him, and when I beat him, he shakes. What do you call a shaking dildo? A vibrator, therefore I call my dog a vibrator.
What did Pennywise become after LEAVING the circus? Ex-IT.
What's tree plus tree?
Sticks!
What’s the worst thing about having a wife with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.
What is an old lady's favorite exercise?
Trying to get up from the soft couch.
What do you call Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
What did the football coach say when he went to the bank?
-"I want my quarterback."
This gay guy was so happy with his new boyfriend that he took him to his favorite gay bar.
An hour or so goes by, then the new flame says, "I just LOVE this place, everyone is so nice, food is great, but what's up with the monkey way down there?"
His friend says "OK, watch this." He goes up behind the chimp and smacked him in back of its head. The monkey jumped off the stool, pulls down his zipper, and gives him head. When finished, the chimp took a napkin, cleaned himself, pulled up his zipper, then jumped back to his chair.
He walked back to his new gay friend and said, "What do you think of that?"
"MAN, I seen some amazing things, but never like that!" His squeeze said, "Wanna give it a try?"
"I sure do, JUST DON'T hit me as hard as you hit that monkey."
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error, error, error.
System shutting down.
What burns up a football stadium?
A football match.
What is a frog's favorite drink?
Croaka-cola!
What do you call a disabled kid's sweat?
VEGETABLE OIL!