Whats jokes
Q. What's the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid? A. One has a functioning neck.
What did Hitler and Usain Bolt have in common?
They both finished the races.
What is the motto of left-wing authoritarianism?
We don't have one, so you don't need one.
What is black and long?
A line at KFC.
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
What do you call three people in a dark room? A porno.
Let's get this right. What's the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg, but you can't beat...
What is a testicle's favorite book?
Put Tony's Nuts in Your Mouth!
A man is driving down the road and runs over a rabbit. He slams on his brakes, gets out, and walks up to the flattened bunny. The bunny is obviously expired.
A passing car slams on its brakes and screeches to a halt. The driver of that car runs up to the bunny, pulls out an aerosol can, and sprays the bunny with the aerosol spray. The bunny jumps up, runs a few feet, then stops, turns around, and waves its paw at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. He continues to do this until he’s out of sight.
The first driver looks at the man with the aerosol can and says, “Wow, that is amazing! What is in that can?” The man looks at the can and reads the label, “Hair restorer, with a permanent wave.”
My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house.
Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood.
Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job.
My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I'm good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.
The teacher is asking you a question.
Teacher: "If your biggest dream came true, what would you be?"
Me: "Dead."
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
One screams when I peel its skin off.
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
What is the best shield to use during a battle? The emo kid.
What did all the humans say when all the pets left town?
A doggone catastrophe!
Some bread teacher: What will Reddit be in a few years?
Dumb Kid: DEADit?
Bread Teacher: You get an FY for FUCK YOU!
Bread Teacher: It will be BREADit!
Student: Hah, that's VERY funny! Might as well go to DEADit so I can die of laughter.
What do depressed teenagers and fruits have in common?
They both hang by something.
I asked my orphan friend what his movie is, he said "Spiderman: No Way Home." I said, "Probably because it's so relatable, right?" He started crying. I don't know why.
What is the difference between a black pilot and Charlie Kirk?
The black pilot is still alive.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of kids drowning.