Whats jokes
What's a dead person's favorite sentence?
"I made it."
What a day yesterday was! I got a promotion, and my sister's killer was hit by a bus. Now I'm in a cast!
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
Family photo! :)
What's the difference between Mars and Africa? Mars has water.
What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards?
DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!
What did the big rose say to the little rose?
"Hi, bud!"
What do you call a fly without wings? Dead.
I was checking my shoe in my dad's wallet, and he slapped me. What exactly did I do to warrant the slap?
Q: What do you call a cow stuck on a barb wire fence?
A: Udderly destroyed.
You know how you mine and craft in Minecraft, and you chat in VR in VR Chat, but what do you do in Alabama?
I remember asking my mum: "What's a couple?"
She replied, "Two or three."
Which probably explains her collapsed marriage.
What screams I’m insecure?
What did the tiger say to the bunny?
Nice to meat you!
What did the purple grape say to the green grape? "Breathe, you idiot, breathe!"
Get it?
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because she was crummy.
What did the toilet say to the other toilet? You look flushed.
What has 1 head, 1 foot, and 4 legs? A bed.
My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"
What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken.
What’s the difference between a police man and a bullet?
At least when a bullet kills someone, it’s actually fired.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? "Going Home."
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
A cow with no front legs walking around?
Beef stroganoff.