What's happening jokes

What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws?

It was given two consecutive sentences.

What happens when a skeleton does not laugh at your pun?

Looks like someone's funny bone is broken. 😁

What happens when you make an asían girl squirt?

She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.

A boss said to his secretary, "I want to have sex with you, but I will make it very fast."

"I'll throw $1,000 on the floor and by the time you bend down to pick it up, I'll be done."

She thought for a moment then called her boyfriend and told him the story. Her boyfriend said, "Do it but ask him for $2,000. Then pick up the money so fast, he won't even have enough time to undress himself." She agrees.

After half an hour passes, the boyfriend calls the girlfriend and asks, "So what happened?" She responds, "The... bastard.....used.....coins."

Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree?

A: It left him/her/them hanging.

What happens when an emo kid tries to high-five you? You leave him hanging.

People be like: "What happened to Fruit Ninja? It was on your phone."

Me: "I upgraded, now I can play on my pro max thigh/wrists."

A German soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her."

What happened to the fly on the toilet seat?

It got pissed off.

You are what happens when women drink during pregnancy.

What happened when your parents dropped you off at the orphanage? They got sued for littering.

Three guys are in the woods, a really smart guy, an average guy, and a really dumb guy. They're bored, so the smart guy decides to go hunting. A little while later he comes back with a deer. The average guy asks, "How did you do that?" The really smart guy says, "I see deer tracks, I follow deer tracks, I see deer, I shoot deer." The average guy says, "I think I understand," and leaves. A little bit later he comes back with a raccoon. The really dumb guy goes *gasp*, "How did you do that!?" And the average looks at him funny and says, "Well, I see raccoon tracks, I follow raccoon tracks, I see raccoon, I shoot raccoon." The super dumb guy thinks for a second and says, "Oooohh, ok, I think I can do that..." and leaves.

Hours pass, and the guy finally returns, hurt, bloody, and horribly mangled. They run to help him. Finally, one of the guys asks him what happened. This is what he said: "I see train tracks, I follow train tracks, I see train, I shoot train. But train keep coming."

Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?

That's what happened to my dog.

What happens if a cookie turns emo?

It becomes a cookie cutter.

What happens when Rick Astley is getting an erection whilst singing "Never Gonna Give You Up"?

You get PRICKrolled.

Last Halloween, I went dressed as a woman. When I rang the doorbell, an elderly woman opened it, and I made a grunting noise and knocked the bowl of candy out of her hands.

She immediately called the police and told them exactly what happened. The officer pulled me aside and asked me a few questions. First, he asked if my parents were here, and I said nothing. Concerned by my answer, he then asked if I was okay, so I said nothing. He asked me what my name was, and I responded, "Hellen Keller."

What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human?

Ask Boeing.

what happens when you accidentally taught your child to call every man daddy?

you find the real one.

Question: What happened to the depressed kid who tried to high five a tree?

Answer: He was left hanging.

People told Kobe to fly high. Look what happened.