Wealth jokes

Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump?

Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!

People see this Rolex and they kill themselves.

Motherfucker, that's a suicide watch!

What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?

I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.

There are two types of faces:

The handsome one, but the wallet is ugly.

Then there is this personal face full of bumps, but even they lack a wallet.

I'm not saying I'm ugly...

But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.

Just give me my money (clap clap clap).

Money means nothing to me. Ask me for it, you will get nothing.

Homeless person says to a rich person, "I'm homeless."

Rich person: "Then buy a house!"

My syndrome may be down, but my money be up 😈.

Baller.

We finally have something in common with Africa. They die of starvation, we die of overeating.

What's the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?

I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

If I had a coin for every time someone said, "If I had a coin," I'd still be living paycheck to paycheck.

Police officers hope you’re a criminal.

Doctors hope you get sick.

Mechanics hope you get car troubles.

But only thieves wish you prosperity.

Weird?

What does Kylie Jenner feed her baby? Plastic MILK! LOL

What makes a raccoon 🦝 very rich?

Its rings!

When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.

"What do you give a man that has everything? Penicillin."

Lucifer's so broke he can't even afford air conditioning units.

Yo mama so fat, Bill Gates went broke trying to buy her dinner.