Water jokes

My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."

Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.

Why does an orphan go to a sewer?

So it can wash up.

I could never fall out of a boat because I've already fallen for you.

TV: Water found on Mars...

Mars: 1

Africa: 0

Why does an emo wish they were a fish?

Because they're underwater.

Why did the white girl come back from Africa?

Because there was no water for her to drink. I'm black.

Why is the bottom of the ocean so dark?

Because the Africans couldn't swim.

Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?

Yeah, it went on and on.

What's the most illegal activity in Africa?

Watering the plants.

What's the rarest gun you can find in Africa? A water gun.

Kid: What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?

Teacher: What?

Kid: Fruity Pebbles with water.

Teacher: Why water?

Kid: 'Cause his dad never came back with the milk.

Sparkling water was invented by Germans. Who else would add gas?

"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."

- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*

You went to the bed store asking for a water bed. They put a pillow and sheets on the ocean.

What do you call a white bucket?

A pail.

Why does the orphan drink hot coco with water?

Because his dad never came back with the milk.

Yo mama so fat when I pushed her into the jacuzzi, it caused a level 8 tsunami.

Yo mama's so stupid, she drowned in the pond because the sign said, "No Swimming!"

Went swimming today and peed in the deep end. The lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so loud I almost fell in.

People were scared of the alligator because it ate everyone, so they called for the water god Aquarius.

He said "Sea ya later, alligator!" and he drowned.