Water jokes
How does Moses make his tea?
He Brews!!!
What do fish smoke? A puffer.
What do you call a terrorist swimming?
A bath bomb!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of water.
WHERE DO THEY REALLY GO BECAUSE WATER CAN NOT BE AT THE TOP OF A HILL!?. I honestly think that only people with a physics degree can make nursery rhythms.
I want to di... dive! Yeah!
Why did the dinosaur take a bath?
So it can get ex-stinked!
You know you’re getting fat when you sit in the bath, and the water in the bath rises.
How to get rid of non-vaccinators: call water a "dehydration vaccine."
I said to the fish, "I have dam."
What’s bin Laden got in common with SpongeBob?
Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, and they’re filled with holes.
Why don't pirates take a shower before walking the plank?
They just wash up on shore.
Some dude: Water you thinking?
Me: You're drowning in my head.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because the dad never came back with the milk.
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
What's the difference between Mars and Africa? Mars has water.
When I found out that my toaster wasn’t waterproof, I was shocked.
Why couldn't the GREAT WHITE beat the HAMMERHEAD?
because the GREAT WHITE kept getting BONKED on the HEAD by the HAMMERHEAD!
What do you call a hippo that has been thrown in a pan?
Hippo-POT-amus!
Q: How can you spell cold with two letters? A: IC (icy).
Q: What state is surrounded by the most water? A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle).
Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and what's the third son's name? A: David.
Pass around the roses, their casket full of hoses, crash it, watch it, the water! OH SHIT IT'S GONNA BLOW!