Water jokes
What's the most illegal activity in Africa?
Watering the plants.
What did the priest say during the christening?
"So anyway, I started blasting!"
What do you call a white bucket?
A pail.
Yo mama's so stupid, she drowned in the pond because the sign said, "No Swimming!"
Yo mama so fat when I pushed her into the jacuzzi, it caused a level 8 tsunami.
People were scared of the alligator because it ate everyone, so they called for the water god Aquarius.
He said "Sea ya later, alligator!" and he drowned.
Went swimming today and peed in the deep end. The lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so loud I almost fell in.
What kind of hair do oceans have? Wavy.
A burger walks into a bar and says, "Hi sir, can I have a glass of water?"
And the waiter says, "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve food here."
What do you call a swimming terrorist? A bath bomb.
Why was the sea sad? Because it was blue.
This morning I woke up, then took a bath with some chocolate mud. At first, when I turned the damn flossers on, I noticed it wasn't water. It was all chocolate mud, and now my body is all chocolatey.
What do you call a coffee without water? Africano.
An optimist says, "The glass is half full."
A pessimist says, "The glass is half empty."
A scientist walks by and says, "You guys are both wrong. The glass is technically completely full because it is half filled with air."
Then Africa comes by and says, "Stop arguing. At least you guys have water!"
If your eyes were the sea, I would drown in them.
What did the tree wear to the pool party 🥳?
Swimming trunks.
What do you call male mermaids?
Mer-butlers!
Is that ass a water barrier 'cause dam[n]?
Africa has every type of gun but one...
A water gun.
"Hey, hey, Spongebob! Water you doing?" [laughs]
"Just looking for all my coins with my metal detector because beach better have my money!" [laughs]
"How much have you found so far?"
"Y'know what, I'm not really shore!" [laughs]