Water jokes
Why does the orphan drink hot coco with water?
Because his dad never came back with the milk.
What kind of hair do oceans have? Wavy.
What mountain cries the most?
A mountain under water.
Two friends are arguing and one friend says, "Jason Warhis is not afraid of water and not ifs, ands, or buts about it."
And the other friend says, "Butt he is."
Let's have toast in the bath.
People were scared of the alligator because it ate everyone, so they called for the water god Aquarius.
He said "Sea ya later, alligator!" and he drowned.
A burger walks into a bar and says, "Hi sir, can I have a glass of water?"
And the waiter says, "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve food here."
What do you call a swimming terrorist? A bath bomb.
This morning I woke up, then took a bath with some chocolate mud. At first, when I turned the damn flossers on, I noticed it wasn't water. It was all chocolate mud, and now my body is all chocolatey.
Why was the sea sad? Because it was blue.
What did the icicle say to the snow?
"Why do you have to be so soft?"
I told a seal a joke, it went like this: "Why did the kid cross the playground?" He said, "Why?" I said, "To get to the other slide." And then he said, "That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!"
What's the most illegal activity in Africa?
Watering the plants.
An optimist says, "The glass is half full."
A pessimist says, "The glass is half empty."
A scientist walks by and says, "You guys are both wrong. The glass is technically completely full because it is half filled with air."
Then Africa comes by and says, "Stop arguing. At least you guys have water!"
If your eyes were the sea, I would drown in them.
What do mermaids wash their fins with?
Tide.
Africa has every type of gun but one...
A water gun.
Is that ass a water barrier 'cause dam[n]?
"Hey, hey, Spongebob! Water you doing?" [laughs]
"Just looking for all my coins with my metal detector because beach better have my money!" [laughs]
"How much have you found so far?"
"Y'know what, I'm not really shore!" [laughs]
10 years ago my dad said I should eat cereal with water until he comes back with the milk... I still eat cereal with water, sadly.