How do you make holy water?
You take it to church ⛪️
Water Jokes
What did the beaver say when it hit the wall?
Dam!
If water makes you laugh, then jokes make you pee.
What happens when you throw water on Stephen Hawking?
He says, "Oh fuck fuck fuck!"
I was boiling some water and said, "Water, you will be mist!"
The optimist thinks the glass is half full. The pessimist thinks the glass is half empty. The feminist thinks the glass is raping them.
This guy walked into a pizzeria and ordered a water. The owner called him an idiot.
His girlfriend walked in and ordered a pineapple pizza.
The guy left her, and the owner made her leave.
There was a race between Lettuce, a faucet, and Ketchup. The lettuce was a-head, the faucet was still running, and the ketchup was trying to ketchup.
Question: How did the cat cross the river?
Answer: It didn’t, it drowned.
Why did the chipmunk swim on its back?
To keep its nuts dry.
Why do ducks have feathers? So they can cover their butt quacks.
What do you get when you throw a pebble into the ocean?
A wet pebble.
What do you get when you throw a pebble in the ocean?
A wet pebble.
My water was leaking, so I used Flex Tape. Now I don't know where to shower.
What is a cow's favorite water sport?
Ca-MOO-ing!
How many Africans does it take to change a light?
A water bottle.
Why did the sea cry?
Because it felt salty and blue.
What did the water say to the water? "Water" you doing?
Why did the guy get the hose?
Because the girl was smoking hot.
I bet my friend $5 that he would die drowning.
A depressing but satisfying victory.
