Vs jokes
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple always gets picked.
What is the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
When you slap a mosquito, it stops sucking you.
What is the difference between a human and a human being in a wheelchair?
What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?
One’s a heated yam, and the other’s a YEATED HAM!
What's one thing that you can say about a train, but not your girlfriend?
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:
"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
What's the difference between a humorous bully and a small van driver? One takes the Mickey, the other takes the Minnie.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are picked.
Women have less rights than a NASCAR track.
What's the difference between a low tide and your hairline?
Nothing, they're both receding.
What is the difference between snow boots and snow boots and walk home?
Why don't a gun and an orphan have anything in common? The gun is actually useful.
What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom?
One snatches your watch. The other watches your snatch.
What's the same about a newborn and a football?
You can kick them both very easily.
What is the difference between a car and a tree?
A tree cannot drive, but a car can drive.
What’s the difference between bossatron5678 and a gay man?
One isn’t retarded, and one isn’t gay; the gay man is dead.
Girls: 🙏 *Period* ✍️💅
Men: 🗿 *Growth* 🗿🗿🗿
Why do orphans prefer IKEA to the Home Depot?
Because the Home Depot provides supplies for *a* home. IKEA just provides furniture.
Therapy - Expensive - Years of hard work - Emotionally draining - Tough to find
Screaming in the woods - Free - Immediate relief - Scares hunters enough to leave, therefore saving innocent animals - Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods.
What's the difference between a boy and girl? A boy always carries an average 5in "do not enter" sign.