Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
Vegetable Jokes
Why do you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
Because once you're a fruit, you can't be a vegetable.
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.
Why did the orange start blushing?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
What do you call a broccoli 🥦 when it’s a ghost?
Cauliflower!
If 2 vegetables have an argument, it's called beef.
What is pedophiles' favorite prey: Vegetables?
I like my vegetables like I like my women: forgotten at the bottom of my freezer.
I was chopping onions with my brothers, so my little sisters cried. Onions was a good dog.
What’s the difference between anal sex and vegetables? One is cruel to the person getting it in, the other is vegetables.
What do my wife and dinner have in common? They are both vegetables.
What did the tomato say to the sad pickle?
"What's the big dill?"
What is an orange cucumber?
A carrot, duh!
What do you call it when you light a person in a wheelchair on fire?
Cooking the vegetables.
Why did the cucumber go to the doctor? Because he wasn't peeling well!
Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?
Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.
(Not meant to be triggering).
If Slade were a vegetable, he’d be a BRUSSELS SPROUT... small, bitter, and NOBODY wants him at the table.
What kind of vegetable makes the best receptionist?
Cauliflower.
I know a baby carrot when I see one.
