Vegetable jokes
Daikon legs.
Did you hear the pickle joke?
It's actually a really big dill.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in!
What did the lettuce say to the carrot?
"Lettuce be friends!"
Why did the lettuce win the race?
Memes
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Cabbage.
Cabbage who?
Cabbage doesn’t have a last name.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Broccoli.
Broccoli who?
Broccoli hasn’t got a surname!
How many potatoes to feed the elephant?
Why did the rapper visit the farm?
To drop some FRESH BEETS!
What did the rapper say to the vegetable?
"Lettuce DROP some BEATS!"
Why do you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
Because once you're a fruit, you can't be a vegetable.
Why did the orange start blushing?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.
If 2 vegetables have an argument, it's called beef.
What do you call a broccoli 🥦 when it’s a ghost?
Cauliflower!
What is pedophiles' favorite prey: Vegetables?
I like my vegetables like I like my women: forgotten at the bottom of my freezer.
I was chopping onions with my brothers, so my little sisters cried. Onions was a good dog.
What’s the difference between anal sex and vegetables? One is cruel to the person getting it in, the other is vegetables.
What kind of vegetable makes the best receptionist?
Cauliflower.