Vegetable jokes
Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage.
Lettuce pray.
What did the potato say when the sweet potato told it to hurry?
I yam.
Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie.
Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!
If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
Are you an artist? Because you’re really good at drawing me in.
I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.
If you were a flower, you'd be a daaaaaamn-delion!
What do you call a bunch of wheelchairs on top of one another?
A vegetable rack.
Normal Europe: Oh no, I lost my iPhone!
Amish: Oh no, I lost my potato!
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
I locked Terri Schiavo in the freezer.
Hey, I thought that's where you were supposed to put vegetables!
I'm always willing to go down on a special needs girl.
Momma always told me to eat my vegetables.
Have you ever wondered why you never see a gay guy in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to become a vegetable when you’re already a fruit.
What is the definition of suspicion? A: A nun doing squats in a cucumber field.
What do you call a flooded hospital?
Vegetable soup.
What's long and hard and has c*m in the middle? Cucumber. What were you thinking?
What has two wheels and goes really fast?
A vegetable down a hill.
When I said I wanted vegetable stew, I didn’t mean boil Stephen Hawking!
It looks like a runner bean, only smaller.
From the makers of Mangeone...
What do you call a eatable door?
- Coriander 😂
Why is there A/C in hospitals?
So the vegetables stay nice and fresh.
What did the rapper say to the vegetable?
"Lettuce DROP some BEATS!"
How many potatoes to feed the elephant?
Why did the lettuce win the race?