Uncle Jokes

Before my grandad died he whispered to me is your uncle still in the basement i said he has died oh my grandad said i will lock him in heavens basement

What's the most between my uncle and ance? My ance waited until I was 14 to come on my face.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Have you heard of the show Naked and Afraid?...... That's what I call hide and seek with my uncle

Kids uncle " your mum said you can have your friends round tonight ! But imma have to baby sit today" . Kid "OK THANK YOU". (AT BED TIME ) Kid " Please may u stop touching my leg BEN!" Ben "im not " (turns light on ) Kid " UCLEEEEE STOP SPILLING MILK OVER ME !!!"

Billy got a bike and a soccer ball for his birthday from his uncle, but he was very upset. Why? Because he has no legs.

I will like to thank my favourite President Barack Obama sorry Barack Obama and my uncle Obama bin Laden I mean Osama bin Laden sorry hummus in my throat

I have an Uncle named ricky, who made ur mom sticky, His dad calls him pricky and everyone begs for his dicky

I had an uncle who was a conductor. He wasn’t a symphony conductor, nor was he a street car conductor, nor was he a train conductor. He was struck by lightning.

I asked my uncle why he was living on the streets. He said that he wasn't always on the streets, he used to have a job at these two towers. I asked him what happened, and he said two planes happened.

mom said dad had the best pullout game... now im an uncle

My uncle is a computer genius! The police even called him a pdf file!!

I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike I just collect body parts