Turn jokes
Your hairline's so ugly, it turned Medusa to stone!
When you're working in the Twin Towers, but you have to turn your computer to airplane mode.
I like plants, but then I decided to turn over a new leaf and branch out.
I thought the dryer made my clothes shrink.
Turns out it was the fridge.
Due to her death, you can no longer get a letter from the Queen when you turn 100.
Instead, you now receive a text from Prince Andrew when you turn 14.
Memes
Your not actually cute so shhhhh
You know they say, when you get lemons make lemonade... Well, I took that a little bit too literal.
Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.
But at least lemonade came out!
The orphan turned 18, but he was happy because he didn't have to pay rent to his parents.
How do you know when a joke has turned into a dad joke?
When it leaves you and never comes back.
Chrome turns you into chrome, but there is a chrome back bling, and it does nothing to you.
What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?
Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.
Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?
Someone turned off flight mode.
(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)
Teacher told me to turn in my essay, but I ain't no snitch, fool.
Your hairline reminds me of a car taking a U-turn.
Aw hell naw,
dey turned Spongilebile in2 a frigin generator.
Yo hairline so bad when people see it, they turn to stone.
"Batteries, batteries, who the batteries in your remotes and everything else you got in your house is turned upside down?"
How can you get 3 homos to sit on one barstool?
Turn it upside down.
There was an exam music quiz question about Gary Glitter. Now, if there's anyone you don't want to associate with the phrase "shh, turn over, you've got an hour," it's him.
Shit, my bad. I should leave him alone, he just wants to settle down and have kids.
How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.