Travel

Travel jokes

Bus

    • "Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!

  • 1

    • Plane

    • I just watched a 9/11 documentary on a plane. Man next to me said, "You know we're going to New York, right?" I told him I just wanna know what I got into.

  • 1

    • Dad

    • What's the difference between MH370 and my dad?

    Both disappeared, but one killed 239 people.

    Hotel

    • A photon is checking into a hotel.

    The bellhop asks him, "Do you have any luggage?"

    The photon replies, "Nope, I'm traveling light."

  • 1

    • Felon

    • I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.

    Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.

    ...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.

  • 2

    • 9/11

    • Me traveling back in time to tell Americans there will be a big tsunami on 9/11/2001, and to survive it they have to climb the two tallest buildings in New York.

  • 6

    • Couple

    • A lesbian couple and a gay couple are going to San Francisco. Who made it first?

    The lesbian couple got there lickety-split.

    The gay couple was still packing their shit.

  • 1

    • Train

    • I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked, "Is this train running on time?" I said, "No, it runs on steam and coal."

  • 1