Trash jokes
Q: Why did Hitler shoot himself?
A: Because his mother taught him to take out the trash.
It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.
When your parents ask you to take out the trash, you knock out your brother, put him in a closet, and when your parents ask where he is, you say, "I took him out like you said."
Your face needs to be put in the trash so people don't need to suffer.
I hope ya'll that have depression kys; you are worthless trash.
Just kidding.
I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?
100 dead babies in a trash can.
What is worse than that?
There's a live one at the bottom.
What is worse than that?
It eats its way out.
What is worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?
Me: Look at the stars in the sky.
Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?
Me: No, it’s a waste of time.
Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.
Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer do when done with his black dates?
He dumped them.
I went to take out the trash, could not find you, so I went back in. The next day I found you.
My mom told me to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
What's worse than a baby in a trash can?
A baby in 10 trash cans.
I took the trash to the recycling bin, and two days later, my mom asked me, "Where's your sister?" I said, "In the recycling line to be turned into a bottle."
Where's your mom?
In the bin.
What did a cat say to the dog?
"I will kill and eat you hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehheehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehheeehehehehehehehe"
A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.
I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...
Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?
Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.
Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!
Me: You can't kick me out.
Manager: Why not? Huh?
Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.
One man's trash is another man's treasure... Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you're adopted.
Why are modern women trash?
Because back in the day, a woman knew her place.
No wonder why I can't find you. You're in the trash bin.
Women be like men are trash, [but] forgets women raised those men.