Transportation jokes

I got hit by a bus.

But the bus was my ex.

Why is the wheel the best invention?

Because it's wheely wheely great!

Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/

What time is it when you get home? Can you walk walk and a car and get home and get a walk home and get a dog 🐕? Today is the night I can drive.

There was a man in a wheelchair, and he got knocked out in front of a bus. He had a wheelie good life!

"Jump in the Cadillac, girl, let's put some miles on it."

You're so bald, United Airlines has asked for permission to land.

Why did the zebra cross the road?

Because he wanted to go to the Shell station.

I lost my luggage at an airport once. I sued the airline, but I lost the case...

Why did Gemma fall off her bike?

She got hit by a fridge.

Why did they make bus stops? So the bus driver would know where to pick the orphan up.

What is a bus ride that is dumb? A boring one.

What has 10 wheels and flies? A garbage truck.

Mom: Please eat, baby!

Baby: No!

Mom: Here comes the airplane!

Q: Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?

A: Because he got hit by a bus.

Someone went to fly and thought of pizza.

Why did your mom cross the road?

Why? She didn't, she got hit by a car.

Why was the duck fired from the train station?

He was a bad conducktor!

Patient: Where are you taking me, doctor?

Doctor: The morgue.

Patient: Hang on! I'm not dead yet!

Doctor: And we're not there yet!

My friend said this to me: "Were you born on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen." :(