Transportation jokes
You can get the park in the park with you if I have park in your car, and I will be there in a couple of hours. Would you be able to pick them out at your house, and I will pick you up, and I will be at your place at your convenience. I can get them in a little while. I’m at the park. Bye.
There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.
One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."
The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."
The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"
What's the difference between a fish and a car?
You can tune a car... but you can't TUNA fish! x3
Call me Kobe Bryant, cause I'm gonna helicopter out of this one.
A pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly. The man answers, "I don't wake up the kids."
Memes
What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette?
I don’t have a Corvette in my garage.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream cone?
Cuz he got hit by a bus while crossing the street.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a shit? I wanna know how it got the car started!
What do you call a bus full of kids? A killstreak.
"SCOOT WANT TAXI!" Ok, maybe I do but can't make it there because yo mama is so fat he can't hear me on the other side.
What's the difference between a plane and a woman?
At least the plane doesn't give you herpes when it crashes at your place.
Why did the little boy drop his ice cream?
Because he was hit by a bus.
What's yellow all over and can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
What is a difference between a tree and a car? A car 🚙 can drive and [a] tree 🌲 can not drive.
What is the difference between a tree 🌲 and a car 🚘?
A car can drive, and a tree 🌳 cannot drive.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To get to the rear end.
What did the bus driver say to the nut 🥜?
"Where do you live?"
Why couldn’t Billy go to school today?
The bus driver hit Sally.
Q: If a boat could fly, where would it go?
A: An airport.
Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/
