Transportation

Transportation jokes

Imagine you go to school, right? You hit the curve, the bus driver be like, "Ahhh, how do I stop the bus?" Students from the bus jump from the windows. One of the students: "That's a YOU problem."

Why did I have to pay $300 on Uber?

I had to get from your forehead to your big ass nose.

What's the difference between a school bus and a cactus?

On a school bus, the pricks are on the inside.

Your mamma is so fat that she saved me a lot of money by sitting in my car when I wanted to buy a low rider.

What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?

Put them in a barking lot!

What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?

Mooooooooooo along!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because he wanted to get to the other side. LOL.

When the driver ran out of fuel, what kind of gasoline did he use? Grassoline.

"Today was the worst day ever." "Why?" Because my ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.

So, I was going out the door and I see my dwarf neighbor at the bus stop. I ask if he needs a lift. He replies with "fu.. off." So, I zip up my backpack and keep going to work.

I can’t believe it’s been over a year since Kobe decided he’s too good to wait in traffic.

Looking at me is like being on your phone, in a car, on a long trip. You're fine for the first 10 minutes, then after that you feel sick.

Someone complimented me on my driving last week. They left a note saying, "Parking Fine!"

I really like those "driverless cars." I saw loads of them last week in the car park.