Why was Aaron's mum sad? The bus missed Aaron.
Once there was a boat. Its friends said,
"It's time to come back." And the boat said,
"No way. I don't give into pier pressure."
Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
Why did the snail paint a big "S" on his car?
Because he wanted people to say look at that S-car go when he rolled by.
How do fish get to school?
By the octobus.
Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?
So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs?
One's a crusty bus station and one's a busty crustacean.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone?
Because she got hit by a bus.
How do you get 100 babies in the back of a pick up truck? Blender.
How do you get them back out? Straw.
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
How do you spell racecar backwards?
racecar
How do you spell racecar sideways?
Paul Walker's death.
I took an Uber home the other day, and the bastard was swerving all over the road and driving on the shoulder... I said, "Who the f*ck taught you to drive?" To this, he replied, "Stevie Wonder."
Stephen Hawking died crossing the road. He was hit by a Universal Serial Bus.
I almost got run over by a car.
For the rest of the day I was taking the backseat as I was wheely tried.
How did the dead baby cross the road?
It was strapped to the chicken.
What's the definition of total chaos?
A bus load of retards passing a magnet factory.
I saw a bicycler flip over a gutter. It was pretty grate.
Why can't Cleopatra ride a bicycle?
Because she's dead.
- Mommy, I want a bicycle!
- Shut up, Sam! You've already got your wheelchair!
How did a man kill his car? He throttled it.
