Trade jokes
I got $1,000,000 for my brother. Best trade I ever made!
Why can't Americans trade with other countries? We lost the trading center!
Dog: Woof!
Butcher: Say less.
Why was the tower of Pisa leaning?
They had better reflexes than the trading center.
Have you ever thought about the fact that every market in Africa is a black market?
Who here plays blox fruits?
Tonight, on Top Gear!
James May dives a bus full of kids off a mountain!
Richard Hammond starts WW3 in Germany!
And I fly a plane into the World Trade Center!
Why is being an electrician the easiest job in the world? It's literally light work.
I was just chilling in the World Trade Center and got airplane wifi.
They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.
I traded my sister for a slice of pizza. Damn, that pizza was good!
Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?
So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
Where do you buy cows in bulk?
At the stock market.
What do magicians and prostitutes have in common?
Answer: disappearing acts.
What did the butcher say to the pig?
Nice to meat you.
Got a PS5 for my little brother yesterday, best trade I'd ever done.
Today I passed the exams to be a funeral director!
Too bad it's a dying trade. :)
What was the weather forecast when the planes hit the World Trade Center? Partly cloudy with scattered passengers!
How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?
Ask them to pronounce "unionized".
Did you know every market in Africa is a black market?
The coach of the Detroit Lions had put together the perfect football team. But then his quarterback got blindsided and was out for the season with a knee injury.
Then his backup went down with a concussion. He tried the trading route, free agents, but nobody any good was available.
One evening while watching the news from Iraq, he saw a young Iraqi soldier with an amazing arm. The soldier rifled a grenade on a perfect arc into a 4th story window from 100 yards, bam!
He tossed another directly into a tight group of 12 enemy fighters 80 yards away, ka-bam! Then a humvee passed, going 60 kph, boom! Another perfect shot!
Coach said to himself, "I got to have this guy. He's got the best arm I've ever seen!"
He tracks him down and convinces him to come to Detroit. The kid takes coaching perfectly, makes all the plays, and long story short, the Lions win the Super Bowl.
The Iraqi is now the Conquering Hero in pro football, and a huge story. But when the broadcast team tries to interview him, all he wants is to phone his mom.
"Mother," he yells over the phone, "We just won the Super Bowl!"
"Don't talk to me," the woman says. "You abandoned us. You can't be my son."
The young Iraqi begs, "Mom, you don't understand! Our team won the biggest game here in the U.S. Thousands of fans are screaming for me. The U.S. President is going to call me!"
"I don't care," his mother snaps. "Right now I can hear gunshots everywhere. Our block is like a ruin. Your brothers were beaten half to death last night, and your sister was nearly raped."
Then she says, "I can never forgive you for making us move to Detroit."