The 50+ Best Import Jokes

I like my women like I like my coffee

Dark,Rich, and Imported

Brojobs is like air It's not important until you don't have any

When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school. At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange letters

'PNEIS'

and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.

Those who answered 'SPINE' are doctors.

Friend 1: What's the most disappointing thing that ever happened to you? For me repeating a year. Friend 2: Failing an important test. And you? ----- Then there is me: My life.

19. It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.

I was working in a IPhone store in Norwich, when an man came! He said "Give me hat-trick or i will destroy your store!" I said "No" and he started to smash phones! I imidiatelly screamed "Important game" and he disappeared! Shame on you penaldo for ruining my store! 😡😡

What do you call a magic car 🚙? A human

So I heard it was important to clean your sex toys, which is why priests invented baptism I guess.

He dead, he alive but most importantly he got a new hard drive

Roses are red Justin beiber is gay But most importantly You know de way

I have an EpiPen

Friend gave it to me when he was as dying

It seemed really important to him that I have it

They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, well not if its poisoned.

then the antidote becomes the most important

What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.

A man needs to leave for lengthy a business trip, but his wife is saddened by this. She explains to him that if he isn’t home every night, there will be no way to satisfy herself if she feels horny. The man claims that she doesn’t need sex, because a dildo should work just fine. He quickly runs to the local gift shop and asks the cashier if the store carries anything really special. The cashier quietly pulls out an old box, and removes a wooden penis from inside. The cashier states that the dildo has been passed down in his family for generations, and was crafted by a witch deep within the Amazon jungle. The cashier sits up in his chair and shouts “Voodoo Dick, the door!” The wooden penis flies across the room, and begins to rapidly thrust itself in and out of the front door keyhole. “Voodoo Dick, the lamp!” The wooden penis flies up inside of the lamp on the cahsier’s desk, and once again, begins to thrust in and out. “Voodoo Dick, return to your box!” The wooden penis flies back into the box and the cashier closes the lid. The man chooses to buy the wooden penis, and just as he is about to leave, the cashier tells him a very important bit of information regarding the Voodoo Dick: “The cursed dildo can only be controlled through verbal commands, it is far too powerful to be moved by hand.” says the cashier. “You must never forget that!” The man nods and heads home. Later that day, the man explains to his wife how the sex toy works, and then leaves for his trip. A few days later, the wife becomes very horny, and opens up the box. She proceeds to shout “Voodoo Dick, my pussy!” The dildo zooms into her vagina, and pleasures her for roughly 6-8 hours. She soon begins to grow tired, and attempts to pull the dildo out of her. She pulls as hard as she can, but just can’t get it it. The wife panicks, and begins driving to the hospital with the wooden penis still inside of her vagina. A police officer pulls her over for speeding, and asks to see some identification. The wife exclaims “Help, help, there is a Voodoo Dick inside of my vagina and it won’t come out!” The officer raises an eyebrow in disbelief. “Voodoo Dick my ass, bitch.”