Worst Jokes Ever
Google is a woman because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence before it makes suggestions.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Trick question, feminists don't change anything.
Why do Priests like playing the violin? They get to finger A minor.
I’m old enough to remember innocent times when the worst headline was plane hijackers flying into buildings.
What did Michael Jackson say to the child sitting on him?
“Just beat it! Just beat it!”
Your mom is so fat that if she sits on top of a gas station, she will lower the prices.
Why are lesbians bad at math?
Because they can't multiply.
Two Italian men get on a bus.
They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. They speak with an Italian accent.
The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
"Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more.
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."
A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?
I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.
If mistakes make people human, then your parents must have been alligators before you were born.
Why did the orphan want to become a prostitute?
To get a daddy.
Can I get a HOYA?
There is this celebrity everybody thought was so down to earth. That was until he hung himself.
Everybody misses Xxxtentacion, but the bullet didn't...
What do you call an Irish lesbian? A gay lick.
Did you hear about the lesbian midget? She probably came out of the cabinet.
How did the black woman name her 4 babies?
Tyrone, Tyrone, Tyrone, and Tyrone.
How did she differentiate them?
She called them by their last names.
What do women and pools have in common?
They both cost a lot of money to maintain for the amount of time you’re inside of them.
What is the best Catholic dating app?
Grinder.
Orphan: "Why can’t I watch a PG movie?"
Me: "They are Parental Guidance."