Worst Jokes Ever

I have a horse named Mayo.

Mayo neighs.

What did the caveman say while seeing a reptile taking off?

Look at that dino-sour!

What did Scorpion say to the ugly person?

"STAY OVER THERE!"

I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak, and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.

Hey girl, are you a farmer? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.

What do women and Nvidia have in common?

They both do not make very good drivers.

Q: Why is China so bad at baseball?

A: They already ate the bat.

What did the bird say to the other bird?

Nothing, because birds can't talk.

Why aren't there any stray cats in Chinatown?

There are, but they're just listed as "pork" on the menus.

Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.

What do 9/11 and gender have in common?

They used to be two, and now it's a sensitive topic.

Roses are red, oranges are orange.

Get a life, quit watching porn.

Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.

Why can't an orphan be gay?

Because they have no one to call "daddy."

I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would probably crash and burn.

"OK, son," he says. "It's as easy as counting to 5."

1. Pull down your pants. 2. Pull back your foreskin. 3. Pee in the toilet. 4. Put your foreskin back. 5. Pull up your pants.

From then on, every time the boy goes to the toilet, he counts from 1 to 5. One day, the father noticed his son was taking quite some time in the toilet. He went to check on him and overheard his son saying, "2,4,2,4,2,4,2,4."

Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?

[Parent’s signature: __________]

My father died in 9/11. It's such a shame. He was a great pilot. 😔

A man walks into a bar and ends up with a concussion.

Maybe if he looked where he was going, he wouldn’t have hit that pole.

Hello, I am Sflugo. I am opening the Pro Orphan Joke Club because a lot of people are saying to get rid of them, but we say NO! If you want to join, comment and say, "#SaveOrphanJokes."