Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken!
What's in a Michael Jackson hotdog?
A 50-year-old piece of meat.
A 12-year-old bun.
Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face, and he asks her, "Why are you rubbing that stuff on your face, mother?"
His mother replies, "To make myself beautiful, Johnny."
A few minutes later, she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. Johnny says to her, "What is the matter? Are you giving up?"
People always said that if you killed a murderer, there would be the same number of murderers. Why stop at one?
My dad died the other day, but I was able to hear his last words: "Son, are you still holding the ladder?"
What is the difference between an orphan and a criminal?
Criminals are wanted.
Why do orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”!
Q: What’s a koala's favorite drink?
A: Coca Koala.
Why is America better than Japan at rapping?
Because we're better at dropping bombs.
What happens when an emo kid tries to high-five you? You leave him hanging.
So the other day, I was looking up zodiac sign stuff, you know, I'm a real big fan of that, and I come across this thing and it’s like all zodiac signs have their own hairstyles... except Cancer.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: They have nobody to call daddy.
What do kids and drugs have in common? I sell both of them.
Boy: "My girlfriend didn't dump me, I dumped her..."
Off the nearby cliff.
A leaf and an emo fall from a tree, who hits the ground first?
The leaf, the rope stopped the emo.
Do you know how to make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell them to clap until their parents come home.
I stole one's balls.
What did the ocean say to the pirate? Nothing, it just waved.
Alright, riddle me this: I am loud and obnoxious, I like music that rhymes. I'm a fraction of the population, but commit half the crimes! What am I?
An emo kid walked to me holding a rope, and asked: "Do you want to join my family tree?"