Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because his mom was in a jam!
"What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!"
If a blind person can’t see, then do they sleep?
They’re the night watchers while people who see sleep.
Which school supply is king of the classroom? A ruler.
If you ever think no one cares about you,
kill someone, then the news will.
"Where do young trees go to learn?"
"Elementree school."
Why did the man miss the funeral?
He wasn’t a mourning person.
It’s important to establish a good vocabulary.
If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.
What do you call inexpensive circumcision? A rip-off.
"I work with animals," the guy says to his Tinder date.
"That's so sweet," she replies. "I like a man who loves animals. Where do you work?"
"I'm a butcher," he says.
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”
“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”
"Why do cemeteries have fences around them? Because everyone's dying to get in!"
"A priest, an imam, and a rabbit walk into a clinic to donate blood. The rabbit turns to the nurse and says, 'I think I'm a Type-O!'"
"What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One weighs a ton, and the other is a little lighter!"
"Did you hear about the guy who got the left side of his body amputated? He’s all right now."
"A dyslexic atheist lies awake at night wondering if there really is a Dog."
I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
My dog is a genius... I asked him what is two minus two, he said nothing.
I think I would like a job cleaning mirrors. It's just something I could really see myself doing.
As a brother, I have to report my sister has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great personality.