Worst Jokes Ever
Where did Sally go during the summer? Swimming.
My friend was annoying me with bird puns. I realized toucan play at this game.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Who.
Who who.
You sound like an owl.
Two of my grandpas died in WW2.
Their tower fell over.
Life has ups and downs, and they had downs.
What do French ducks say?
Quoi quoi.
Yo momma so fat, her four kids use her as a bed and her fat rolls as cozy blankets.
How do Asians name their babies?
They throw pots and pans around.
"Ching, Chang, Clang!"
What's the definition of rude?
Sticking a blind man in a corner and telling him to find his wife.
There's a new cooking programme on BBC1. The contestants are victims of domestic violence. It's called "Can't Cook... Right Hook."
I call my dad a motherfucker because he fucked his mom.
Have you heard the new pickup line in a gay bar?
Can I push your stool in for ya?
Hi, I...
Sorry, my cat touched my computer. I don't know how to delete.
The joke is that if you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Sorry guys, it's a hard word to spell.
People are like tequila glasses,
you gotta shoot them down fast.
Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
So he could get into high school.
Chuck Norris doesn't fly on airplanes.
Airplanes fly on Chuck Norris.
How many animals can you fit in a pair of underpants?
A. A cock and a few hairs (hares).
Boy: Can I go to the bathroom?
Teacher: If you sing the ABCs.
Boy: ABCDEFGHIJKLMNORSTUVWXYZ!
Teacher: Where’s the P?
Boy: In my pants! Lol. That’s all mates! Have a good day! (Or night)
There's a new game in the arcade where kids can hit raging paedophiles with a mallet: Whack-A-Jack, oh!
Why is my sister horny? It's because she loves my dick.