Worst Jokes Ever
How do you make a dead baby float?
1 cup rootbeer 2 scoops dead baby.
Michael Jackson goes to the doctor.
Michael Jackson: "Help, doctor, I've been shot!" Doctor: "I can't fix that, but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again."
There are 10 types of people in this world.
Those that know binary and those that don't.
I told my friend that someone accused him of blowing dead bears. I said I defended him by responding that I saw 1 get up and walk away.
So a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and he asks the bartender for a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink.
Why can't dinosaurs clap? 'Cause they're dead.
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven is a registered sex offender.
What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? -- Tequila Mockingbird.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
A ffsshh.
How do you sink an American battleship?
Have the French build it.
Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris.
Pinocchio goes to the doctor for a checkup. When he gets there, the doctor asks him, "Do you have cancer?" Pinocchio replies, "That was very straight up, but no, I’m pretty sure I don’t have cancer." After saying this, his nose grew.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
What do you call a horse rider with Down syndrome?
Down Quijote.
What did the turtle do when he ran out of gas?
He went to the Shell station.
Why is flour retarded?
Because it's in-bread.
What do you call a belt made of watches? A waste of time.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts to do it.
I like my woman like I like my coffee: in a big sack on top of a donkey.
When you go to your friend's house to fuck her brother, but realize he's your brother from your mom's side.