Worst Jokes Ever
My sister gives her hamster to my brother since she thinks I'm irresponsible, so I throw it out the window.
What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers? Well hung.
What are women allergic to and always try to dodge?
Accountability.
A blind man walks into a woman's bar and asks the person next to him if she would like to hear a blonde joke. The woman says, "Before you tell your joke, you should know the bartender is blonde and has a shotgun, the bouncer is blonde and has a baseball bat, the two playing music are blonde and have pistols. Do you still want to tell that joke, cowboy?" He thought for a second and said, "Not if I have to explain it five times."
Why was Michael Jackson kicked out of boy scouts? He was up to a pack a day!
My girlfriend dumped me today. Apparently, I don't stand up for her in fights. I don't care. She used to push me around all the time.
The cheetah had a race with a lion, and the cheetah won.
The lion was like, "Why you always a cheetah?"
The cheetah was like, "Why you always lion (lying)?"
Covid said to stay 6 feet... I didn't think Kobe meant it literally.
Nobody:
Michael Jackson: giving kids a free cream pie.
Abortion is a really touchy subject for me. On one hand, there's dead babies! But on the other hand, women get a choice.
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
"If we don’t get some support people will think we are ball sacks..."
My aunt visited and saw all of the stuff around the house my mom had kept over the years and said, "If you have something that no one likes, and it only makes people upset, or it's useless, throw it away."
The next time my aunt visited, she said, "Where is your daughter?"
My mom said, "I took your advice."
What's worse than placing 10 babies in a trash can?
Placing 1 baby in 10 trash cans...
Why do priests play Geometry Dash? Cuz they can beat Demons.
What's the difference between WW2 kamikaze planes and 9/11?
One of the missions succeeded.
Yo hairline was used as the blueprint for the Great Wall of China.
What does Michael Jackson and Jeffery Dahmer have in common?
They both enjoy kids' company.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple? Apples get picked.
Why did the depressed kid cross the road?
To get hit by a car.
When the school shooter breaks into the classroom, and you look at your friend because it's the kid you predicted.