Worst Jokes Ever

It was the year 1912. I was in the SS Titanic, and I woke from a dream to think, "I've heard of wet dreams, but is that WATER?"

Depression, I got it.

A girlfriend, don't got it.

A life, don't got it.

Help, got it.

Friends, don't got it.

Family, I got it.

Best of all, depression, I got it!!!!!!

Your mama so fat the flash died halfway running around her.

Trump says to Obama, "You know it’s the White House, not the black house, right?" And Obama says, "Yeah, but it isn’t the orange house either."

Roses are red, violets are blue, Fortnite is dead and so are you.

Jokes about menstruation are not funny. Period.

What's the best part of having sex on a golf course?

The hole experience.

What is easier to pick up the heavier it gets?

Women.

Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?

IHOP.

What did the leper say to the prostitute?

You can keep the tip.

Where do people with no legs go to have fun?

Legnoland.

What does DNA stand for?

National Dyslexic Association.

Want to hear a joke about milk? No, it's too cheesy.

How do you get an emo out of a tree?

Just cut the rope.

And the Lord said onto John, "Come forth to receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

A man has a terminal illness and isn't sure how long he has left to live, so he talks to his doctor. The man asks, "How long am I going to live?"

The doctor says, "Depends, what time is it?" The doctor then looks at his watch and says, "10".

The man asks, "Ten what?"

Then the doctor keeps going, "6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1".

I want to thank all the sidewalks out there for keeping me off the street.

Son: "Dad, are we pyromaniacs?"

Dad: "Yes, we arson."

Why did the sea cry?

Because it felt salty and blue.

Two scientists walk into a bar. One says, "I want h20." The other said, "I want h20, too." The second scientist died.