Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

The last joke about the dad was a joke. Don't take it seriously. Can't believe that people actually think that was true.

I was sitting in math class, and our teacher doesn't like it if we don't work on math in his class. So, I did science homework on top of a math book.

What did the skeleton say to the other? "Wow, that song, 'Spooky Scary Skeletons,' really does send chills down my spine!"

So I went to the binoculars shop the other day. Tell you what, they saw me coming.

Did you know that a lot of graves are put in churchyards?

Yeah, they're pretty holey.

How do you keep your friends from boring you with pictures of their children?

Every time they show you a new one, you say, "Oh FUCK yeah!"

What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?

Others: R.

Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.

My parents told me I was born on the highway.

Apparently that’s where most accidents happen.

My only friend who actually cares: "Stop making suicide jokes, I’m really concerned!"

Me: Okay, I’ll cut it out.

A girl walks into an Adult Store. "Hi, I want to buy that red dildo right there."

Cashier: "That's a fire extinguisher, you whore."

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    • The Good Old Days.

    You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

    I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly, Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dove to save it. He said he always dives for pens.

    Today, I had an exam in school. When I was done, I raised my hand and yelled, “Pisstiano Penaldo!”

    My teacher smiled and took my paper. She knew I was finished.