Worst Jokes Ever

How did the man with no arms commit suicide?

We'll never know - he didn't leave a note.

My doctor prescribed a new drug to treat my depression.

It’s called Enditol.

My mom asks, "How did you do this?" Me: "Naw, I did it with a fork. WHAT D'YA THINK?-"

I wrote down a speech at home yesterday.

When I got to school, I was speechless.

Yo mama so fat that she was born on the 3rd, 4th, and 5th of March.

Yo mama so fat, One Punch Man had to punch 3 times.

You are what happens when women drink during pregnancy.

When Kenney goes down on his mom, does he taste vegetable or fish?

Give a blind kid a torch and tell him it's a hairdryer.

If you ever feel useless... Just remember that if you ever feel useless... Just remember that it took the US 4 presidents, trillions of dollars, thousands of lives, and 20 years to replace the Taliban with... the Taliban.

Don't worry about missing a shot after yelling "Kobe". He didn't make it either.

Why do kids prefer to spend more time with their dad than their mom?

They already know that their dad is gonna get "Milk" and never return.

I thought I saw Jojo Siwa... no wait, it's your hairline.

I have been thinking about suicide lately. I mean, hey, my mom tells me I can do anything I put my mind to.

What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?

A baked potato.

Your hairline looks like the McDonald's sign M.

Today, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.

My parents are the worst.

Kid: "Dark humor is like a mother's love."

Orphan: "How?"

Kid: "You wouldn't know."

Orphan: "........."

I ate the Emo Emo no Mi from One Piece. It gave me the powers of black hair, depression, and suicidal thoughts.

Can we stop talking about 9/11? My dad died, man, but he was a good pilot.