Worst Jokes Ever
I ran over an emo yesterday? I wanted to let him see pitch black.
I threw a lamp at an emo? I tried to lighten up his day.
What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it's not coming anyways.
How do you help a depressed kid face their fears... You count to 3 and say jump?
After long consideration, I've decided to get a zebra tattoo on my wrist. Not like anyone will notice the difference.
Roses are red, Violets are twisted, You bend over, You're about to get fisted.
Yo mama is so fat, that when I unfollowed her on Instagram, my phone got 1 GB of storage.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you."
Radiohead had to remake "Fake Plastic Trees" after encountering Carrie Underwood in real life for the first time.
Why don't black people go on cruises? They're not falling for that one again.
Friend: Did your tattoos hurt?
Me: Nah, not really.
Friend: What did they feel like?
Me: 7th grade.
Friend: 😶😶😨😰😰😰😨
If I were a history teacher, I’d make the two twins stand up and throw a paper airplane at them.
How is sex like air? It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
Why are gay people so bad at math? Because they can't multiply.
If I wanted to commit suicide, I would climb up to your ego, and then jump down to your IQ.
I saw a fat dude wearing a shirt that said "guess." I said 215kg, he didn't find it as funny.
If you wanna really know how to get under my skin, give me a razor and maybe we'll talk ;)
What do lesbians do when they have a problem? They finger it out.
Why did the scientist want to take off his doorbell?
Because he wanted to win the no-bell prize.
Q: What's the difference between LeBron James and a priest?
A: The size of balls they play with.
You are so ugly, Hello Kitty had to say bye-bye.