Worst Jokes Ever
"You look like you've lost some weight."
"Really? Well, whatever weight I lost, you found it, pal!"
Why did the skeleton want a friend? He was feeling bonely.
Teacher: If you keep talking over me, I'll call your parents!
Orphan: You will?
Did you hear about the magician who did magic with chocolate?
I heard he had loads of Twix up his sleeve.
A grasshopper jumps into a bar.
The bartender says, "We've got a drink named after you."
The grasshopper says, "Seriously? Why would you name a drink Callum?"
Children in the dark make mistakes.
Mistakes in the dark make children.
What do you call Amber Heard crying during the lawsuit?
A DEPPression.
(If you are a fan of either Johnny Depp or Amber Heard, you might get the joke).
Apparently, rock bottom has a basement.... :\
I tend to think my ‘depression’ is for attention. I guess I have depressed depression.
What was Frankenstein's second job? -- He was a bodybuilder.
What's the difference between Carrie Underwood and a robot?
A robot can feign empathy.
Knock knock. Who's there? Parents. Parents who? That's what an orphan would say.
What do you call a black person eating chicken, watermelon, and drinking Kool-Aid?
Reality.
What do Drake and math have in common? They’re both hard for kids.
Why is it a bad idea to eat a clock? Because it's so time-consuming.
A new drug has been developed for lesbians with depression.
It’s called Trycoxagain.
Q: Do you know why transgender people are good at being carpenters?
A: Because they have more experience cutting off their wood.
Today in class, I screamed "Jenga!"
We were watching a 9/11 documentary.
Q: What's the difference between LeBron James and a priest?
A: The size of balls they play with.
My heart says to stop because it hurts.
Bro, chill. It's really not that deep.