Worst Jokes Ever

Ever heard of ligma? Ligma ba--

You're so short that I had to ask God why he made you short-ass toothpick legs.

Q: When a chip gets popped, what happens to it?

A: It gets pooped out of the bag.

Q: What type of flowers do orphans hate? A: Mums.

What do you call a sharpened pencil? You call a sharpened pencil a sharpened pencil.

A woman was in the Twin Towers. She orders a pepperoni pizza but got a plane pizza.

Q: What was Hitler's least favorite candy?

A: Jujubes.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Little old lady.

Little old lady who?

Little old lady, you don't need to yodel about it. Yodel who? Yodel who?

Me: Ice woman diary: a witch's tin key.

Other: What? You said, "I swim in diarrhea, which is stinky?"

Luke asks his friend, "How old is your father?"

James replied, "He's as old as me."

Luke then said, "It doesn't make any sense."

James then said, "He became my father when I was born."

I was sitting in class when my teacher said, "Have any questions?" the suspended Class clown said, "Who's Joe?" So the teacher said, "Joe who?" So the clown said, "Joe Mama!" So I said, "What in the BALLS?" So I ended up staying in detention with the clown, ah, so cozy!

I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.

My ass itches.

I am starting a frog cult now!

Warning! Cringe Alert!

What happens when you leave your phone at jail?

It becomes a cell phone.

"Fuck you, do something about it!"

You know what? I know five fat people, and you're four of them!

Hairline got repossessed.

What’s worse than a girl getting a period?

A boy getting a period.

6 was afraid of 7 because 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared?

Because 10 was in 9/11.