Worst Jokes Ever
I cried when Dad cut onions. Onions was such a good dog.
What do you call a kid going fast on a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
The parentless child stood as her orphanage was blown up by a kamikaze I had rented.
Q: Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
A: Because they lost two of their towers.
What do orphans get at restaurants?
The family meal.
Why is the queen the most powerful piece in chess?
Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.
What goes in small and soft?
And comes out big and hard?
A tea bag.
Why does an orphan go to a spelling bee?
So they can spell "home."
Jokes about the poor aren't rich.
Republicans really want weed not to be legal, fucking cunts!
What do you call James Bond when he’s taking a bath?
Bubble 07.
Kid: Hi.
Janitor: Wtf you want, kid?
Kid: Why are you rude?
Janitor: 'Cause I have a shitty job.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make them clap until their parents come back.
Who are the fastest readers in history?
9/11 victims. They went through 80 stories in 10 seconds.
Why is America so bad at playing Jenga?
Because they already lost two towers.
My teacher gave me an A in Physics, then she tells me that it turns guys on.
Mama is so Catholic, Swiss cheese wishes it was as holy as she is. Do you...
Teacher: What’s the closest planet?
Kids yell: Sun.
Except for one.
Other kid: Uranus.
Teacher: Uranus?
Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.
Why can't orphans open a family business?
Because there is no family.
Why did the loo 🚽 roll roll down the stairs? To get to the bottom.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!