How do you punish a blind kid?
Rearrange the furniture.
Worst Jokes Ever
Your life, that's all.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because they thought they saw their parents. (Plot twist: the orphan got ran over.)
(Only Ninjago fans understand XD)
If you look outside and it's really windy, it's really cloudy, and the sky looks greenish... you better run, 'cause it has to be Morro!
What is similar between a ton of kids and some boxes?
Both of those are commonly found in basements.
Why was the cow afraid?
He was a cow-herd.
What do Karens do when they have free time?
They do KARENoke and sing a Karen song.
Why was the fart on Kickstarter? He just needed some gas.
Dad: Why did Jimmy fall off his bicycle?
Son: Why?
Dad: Because somebody threw a washing machine at him.
...
Why do orphans hate hide and seek?
Their parents went to play hide and seek years ago.
My girlfriend used to give the best blowjobs, then she grew teeth.
I like my wine like my women:
16 and in my basement.
Why download Fruit Ninja when you have your arm?
Why did the Jew get an electric car?
Because he was afraid of the gas.
Why do the Twin Towers have Elton John?
Because Elton "IS STILL STANDING".
What did the blind kid say after receiving a cheese grater for Christmas?
"This is the most violent book I’ve ever read."
I don’t know if Jesus was black or white, but I know he for sure wasn’t Asian because people wouldn’t ask him to take the wheel.
They're making a new Alien movie.
There are so many aliens you can't keep track.
The general proofreading Hitler's speeches was the original Grammar Nazi.